In this blog I will write, what everyone have been writing or have written, nothing more and nothing less, what I observed and I feel and how I view such ceremonies. I have touched on this subject many times, though very indirectly.
Today, Saturday 27th of June 2008 I attended one such wedding. It was in the open ground close to the sports complex of the Islamic International University, Kuala Lumpur. It was just a normal wedding celebration, where in this case the groom’s side is holding the party, and only last week the bride side held a party, where the groom had to sign all the legal papers for these two to be legally married.
As you enter the location, you are ushered by the hosts, usually the parents or the relative of the groom or even the brothers and sisters. As a token they give you an egg or similar gifts, probably in token of appreciation for the wedding gift which you may have brought along with you. Even if you do not have such gift they will still give you the egg. The egg probably represent or symbolic of the couple being productive.
Actually nothing is said about this, but I am just assuming. Sometime such token is not given when you enter, they may give it to you while you are eating the food served or even when you leave. But in most cases, when you leave you give your host token ‘payment’ for the hospitality. Not much, but a fair sum, maybe just RM 50.00 or even more if you are well off. I have known people giving up to RM 1000.00, but these are on very exceptional circumstances. But don’t be surprise if the hosts gets so much more when the guest may be trying to curry favour.
Of course the VIP tables are all set,
food ready to be served.
And some may even be served. You may eat when you arrive, at the specified time of arrival and you may leave after such eating.
And the kitchen is ever ready to provide more food.
Actually the host had already estimated how much food may be required, he already knows his number of guests expected. Unexpected guest may not exist at all, people are shy to go to such feast if not invited.
And the stage is set, where the bride and the groom will sit, they are the ‘king for the day’. These are specially decorated seats.
And of course the bride and the groom
and the flower girls. Probably having the flower girls is influenced by the western ways.
And of course the music.
A proper set up, some even may have DJs to entertain the guests. A more expensive wedding may even hire a live band. Of course a more expensive wedding may even be held in hotel ballrooms.
Once seated then they greeted, in this case by ‘pancak silat’. ‘Silat’ is actually the Malay way of self defence, but traditionally it alsao have a sort of introductory dance, so the Malays use that as a mean of greeting. But of course they must also show their prowse in the self defence.
And the ‘merenjis’ ceremony, which is really a Hindu influence which somehow are carried over by the Malays to this day, mind you Malays are Muslims. A conflict? I wouldn’t really know but I do not believe in the ‘merenjis’ any more, so I do partake in such a ceremony. The ceremony? I cannot really describe it now, it has been transformed over a period. What do they do? Just watch it on the video.
And then the usual thing of ‘eating at the couple’s table' (now being prepared) with the close relatives and to be witnessed by the guests present
and ‘cutting the wedding cake’ which is really a western influence.
A wedding may cost a lot of money, so the family or the couple will spend according to what they can afford. The wedding described above was just a normal wedding which did not require a lot of money to be done with. There may be more grand weddings or some simple wedding, depending on circumstances.
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